I really don’t know what’s wrong with me sometimes. I was at the mall today doing some Christmas shopping. I was in one of those retail clothing store thingies and I saw someone that I haven’t seen in a while. Initially, I wanted to walk up to her and say hi, but for some reason, I just felt an intense need to turn around and walk away. I have no reason for it. It’s not that I didn’t want to talk to her. She’s great and we get along splendidly. I don’t know what it is. I used to do it all the time at the U. It was even worse at AI since it was a building as opposed to a campus. And it wasn’t just acquaintances, I’ve avoided semi-close friends too.
I don’t have any solution for my issue. I’m not sure I’ll have one until I understand why I do it. I don’t think it’s my loner mentality. As a kid, I never really had close friends. I had a few good friends, but I never really hung out with them outside of school. Then again, maybe it is my loner mentality and Alice DeeJay was on to something and that I, for some reason, believe that I’m better off alone. I don’t know what to make of it. I just know I should probably confront it the next time I’m put in that situation.
Maybe this is all just a case of the Christmas blues. I still don’t feel Christmas yet. That’s probably another issue altogether.